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Friday, May 3, 2013

Sometimes I wonder why I bother listening to the radio in the mornings, at least the talk shows. I stopped watching the news ages ago because of how terribly every single agency conveys any bit of "news" that happens to slide across the desk. This morning I was listening to "The Bert Show" as I usually do and human decency came into question once again.

One of the hosts on this show wanted advice from the listeners about how to tell a friend of his that she is terrible at cooking meals. Apparently this woman has dinner parties fairly often that many people attend, but everyone at the event is well aware of how awful her food is, yet will not say anything. This party host has no idea of her food failures. The host of the show began fielding advice from listeners which included everything from: "Just keep playing along instead of hurting her feelings." or "Suggest doing a potluck under the pretense of her not having to stress over cooking for everyone." The host eventually came to his own conclusion that he should tell her husband (who is also aware of how bad the food is) to buy her cooking lessons as a gift so she can learn more about her hobby.

I was very disconcerted about this horrible "advice" because here we have a woman who is putting a huge effort into cooking for multiple, regular events but does not have the culinary skills as she has been told. Those who supposedly care about her would rather she embarrass herself and talk about her to each other instead of telling the truth? This is so awful. Even her husband who is with her for the sake of being one in the same with her for life and should always be truthful has allowed this to go on for years now. Is this what we have become?

We wonder why the world is so deceitful and underhanded currently, but it all starts at the bottom with ridiculous happenings like this. Being honest has become the exception instead of the rule in so many things we do that I find it disgusting. In full disclosure, if you want to tell me I am a hypocrite or that I continually do something inferior, please tell me. I can take it as long as it is done when you first notice the issue instead of allowing me to look like a pillock for months or years at a time.

We do life with each other and we feed off of each other, but we cannot seem to be truthful for the sake of each other. With situations we create like this, there is no wonder the age demographic of committed relationships has been on a steady rise and marriages are failing in ever increasing numbers. We fake too much.

The thing is, we cannot change anyone and who they are. I have run into this too many times in my own life experience. Seeing someone chase after and cling to another person under the hopeful thoughts of that person changing really breaks me down. We do not seem to realize that we cannot force someone to like us in a friendship or romantically but we keep up the initial lies about ourselves that we should not be telling in the first place. This is a flaw in relationships and connections I absolutely hate and the very reason I do not purposely make a personal effort to impress anyone for any reason. I did in the past, but realized doing so creates broken friendships and horrible, dishonest relationships.

There is such a huge problem in the identification process of people. We cling to past notions of the days when these people were trying to make a false impression to us of who they really are and believe that as fact. We would rather believe what we want people to be instead of seeing the reality of who is standing in front of us. Unfortunately, the majority of the world is not real; the majority of the world will lie for their own benefit or to make themselves look better to others. The woman with the dinner parties has an entire group of dishonest and destructive friends but has no idea. Even worse, she married someone who is dishonest to her, which further proves my point about why even those we think we know on a deep level are probably not who we think they are.

If I know you, I will be honest with you and also if I do not. My circle is small because with so may fake people in the world, I have to be sure that my relationships matter long-term. The more people we surround ourselves with who we have false impressions of, the more we are setting ourselves up for trouble. Always stay guarded and be careful of who you let in. If any doubt persists, walk away and do not allow anyone to butter you up untruthfully. Better still, do not act like a pretentious jerk and break the mold in your own, honest way.

Grace and Peace,



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