I arrived at a rather stupid conclusion today. When I write things that are supposed to be of substance and meaning I always keep in mind that if anyone should listen to the words in my blogs it should be me. Then today, when I jumped on my computer after work, I found myself being a hypocrite and it was all based off of this picture:
That would be me on the bottom left.
When I logged onto my Facebook after coming home this afternoon, I had a little notification asking me to approve a photo tag. I disabled the push notifications from Facebook on my iPhone months ago, so I had this little gem waiting for me. As I had done with all photo tags over the past two years or more, I was ready to click the little "Hide" button and forget about it. Doing this is something I had grown accustomed to because of who I was about 70lbs ago. During that period of time I was pretty unhappy with myself and all of the pending photo tags made me "look fat" because...I was fat...
When the photo above popped up for me to review, I took one look at it and had made the decision to not allow the tag since I thought I still looked fat in it. This is apparently because I am an idiot and somewhere along the line became really vain and stupid. Before I clicked the "Hide" button, I sort of snapped out of my preconditioned daze that had developed over the years and realized I was a hypocrite for writing about being proud of yourself and confident on my blog but not practicing it myself in this situation. Until I realized such a trivial thing should not matter in the first place.
The truth is, my torso does look abnormally large in this picture and the reason is because even though my body is 70lbs lighter, that shirt is from when I was 70lbs heavier. I am still losing pounds here and there, so buying a wardrobe of smaller clothes that I may shrink out of does not yet make sense. This fact was the basis of my idiotic paranoia and concern for what someone else would think of me.
At the end of the day, and after realizing I should start eating (ha!) my own words and putting them into practice I am able to say I have no intention of ignoring anymore photo tags on Facebook. If Thinner Drew happens to be wearing Fat Drew's clothes, then so be it, that no longer matters to me.
Be who you are and never forget the personal milestones you have reached for any reason. Always listen to yourself when you are of sound mind and push any negativity away from yourself. If someone in your life makes you proud, be sure to tell them and give them praise to keep up the whole of who they are.
This also happened today:
Grab a can of lacquer-based sanding sealer and if the conditions are right, it will explode. All up in your eye-hole. And on your clothes, and in your other eye hole, in your ear, in your mouth, and all over your skin. After a shower, a few shots of eyeball cleaner, and about two hours of painful tissue burn, I think everything is well again.
Tiffany says "hello".
Grace and Peace,
-Drew
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/drew.silvers
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/drewcoustic
Email: drewcoustic@gmail.com
The lyrics in the title of this blog are from this song:
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