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Tuesday, September 30, 2014

A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend about how people who boast about confidence tend to have the least amount of it because they have confused confidence with acting like a brat.  You know these people - those who always have to talk about what they're spending their (or someone else's) money on by throwing it all over social media.  Who am I kidding though?  Just today I put up a Facebook post about paying a $201 speeding ticket that I received in Texas a few weeks ago.
Yeah, who needs to show off a $200 steak entree when you have a moving violation?  I broke the law!
It's all a little silly if I'm honest, but whatever makes you feel better about yourself, right?
But that's just the problem... 
Too many of us still walk away feeling empty inside.

I think the quality of our relationships has sort of fallen off and made many of us so insecure that the only way to feel important or relevant is with the most disconnected encouragement possible.  That's why some of us post crap like:
"Well, that didn't go like I wanted it to."
"I don't even want to talk about it."
Fishing for contact and sympathy of things unknown to our "audience" makes us feel like we're accomplishing something instead of actually asking someone we trust to listen to us vent or talk through whatever the issue is.  We want to feel loved and encouraged by the masses of our following instead of having a core of people who invest equally in our lives as we do into their's.
"Oh my god, that sounds SOOOO boring."
But it works and you don't look like a dramatic pre-teen trapped in a twenty-five year old body.  Well, maybe you do.  In which case I would suggest warm cookies and a nap.

Maybe it's because I don't take social media seriously anymore.  Sure, if I think of something off the wall and potentially encouraging, I'll throw it on up there, or if I buy a squirrel mug...
But, for the most part, my social media life is a reflection of me and the weird things I do.  A stark contrast to reaching out for digital comfort because it took the guy thirty minutes instead of fifteen for an oil change, followed by Starbucks running out of pumpkin flavored corn juice to go into my latte.
"Ugh.  Bad day, don't ask.  Don't eveeeeen!"
Don't worry, I never will.

Sometimes Gawker picks up the stuff I write, so I end up reading Jezebel from time to time (yeah, I know).  A few days ago, they had an interesting article about how people who make regular posts online about their happiness in relationships are usually the most unsure of their stability. 
 Sometimes I think men and women temporarily change their names to "My Fiancee" a few months before their wedding because I rarely see their future spouse calling them by their birth name.  
I'm not against marriage, I actually love the idea, but I think people get caught up in the game of throwing titles around so much that they lose scope of their relationship.  It's that growth thing I talk about so often.
I can't say for certain, but I would like to think the whole "social media reach-out" idea with relationships also applies to whatever else we talk or complain most about in that outlet as well, right?

We land right back at our relationships though, and living in the digital age makes faux-friends more accessible than tangible friends.  I'm not saying you can't have friends you don't see physically who won't back you up and aren't important, but I'm saying having a solid group of tangible friends is equally as important.  It comes back to confidence and not feeling it necessary to be needy online.  Because when you act like a spoiled, entitled brat on the internet, more people talk about you than if you acted that way in front of a friend who would then tell you that you're acting like a complete idiot...
At the very least, they would act like they don't know you when you are kicking and screaming on the floor, saying something about Chick-fil-a not having a gluten free menu...

That's the real world translation.
You're welcome.

Grace and Peace,

The title of this blog came from the lyrics in this song:



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