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Monday, September 29, 2014

You face those hard moments of reality sometimes when something you've tried so hard to maintain just doesn't work out anymore.
My grandfather had this old Ford truck that he sort of pieced together from a junk yard because that was all he could afford at the time.  Someone had used that truck,  appreciated it for a relevant and meaningful amount of years, and moved on.  Then my grandfather found it ideal for himself and also used it for some time before he was unable to maintain it anymore due to his age.  Now it belongs to someone else even though he has been gone nearly two decades, but it still exists, and last I heard, it looks brand new.

Taking the concept to a personal level, there are different reasons as to why we become distant to the people who were formerly so important to us.  Sometimes we just grow so differently and rapidly but still try to hold on to what once was flourishing, even though the act of maintaining it holds us back.   I think we all continually grow as long as we allow ourselves to do so. With this personal growth we also  have a tendency to outgrow some people whom we held as incredibly important in the past.  Sometimes it is clinging onto that one little piece of the past that keeps us from thriving or moving forward in other things we are seeking.  In our desperation to not lose what was once so valuable, so perfect, and so beautiful, we make life more complicated because letting go seems harder.  We would rather have our emotions and heart shatter into a million pieces over time than go through one hard and devastating break.  "I'll just hang on for a little while longer." is the common excuse and the most logical way to avoid the issue in our own minds. Only because ignoring reality is often easier than accepting it.

The thing is, sometimes people just grow apart and there is nothing we can do about that without hindering our own progress in life - without taking a step back and dwelling there.
But it's hard.
It's really hard.
When you go through so much only to figure out that one day it would have to start fading away into that horrible moment where maintaining the clash is just too damaging to continue.

I guess the hardest part is knowing that it wasn't either person's fault.  That's just how life goes and how perspectives change.  Romance is actually easier because you can get hurt and walk away, but invested friendships which have fallen apart can make you feel like you're being eaten alive from the inside out in a way you can't really prevent.
You assumed it would always be the same for the rest of your life.

None of this hard reality means you love someone any less and it doesn't mean you wouldn't move mountains for them in a time of dire need.  What it means is that sometimes the attempt at maintaining each other for the sake of each other will never be mutual anymore.
We're told to bend and not break and that it's better to compromise instead.
Sometimes you have to break...
Sometimes you have to leave the past where it was to preserve the memories.
It doesn't mean you don't care.
It just means you're growing up...

No drama, no baggage, just growth.
We all go through it, some more gracefully than others.

Grace and Peace,


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