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Friday, January 31, 2014

Why Hope May Not Be So Important After All...

Hope is a confusing word, and one that I am very mindful about using only in certain instances. What I mean is that I do not apply the word "hope" when making reference to any situation I am going through on my own, but instead am sure to only apply it to the situations of others.  This means if a friend is going through a rough time, I may say something to the effect of:
"I hope it gets better for you."
Which directs a bit of my own aspiration for their success to them.  Concerning myself, though?  I hope nothing for myself and I have no sense of "hope" for anything to work out.  
Let me explain a little.

Within my own experience, we live in a world of excuses and open-ended expectations for not just each other, but practically everything around us and even ourselves.  As people we are essentially taught to shift blame to others for whatever may be working against us, or that we need to figure out how we are supposed to have someone else fix our issues for us.  What?  No way.  Actually, if you have never worked in a business that is structured so a group of people converse together in obtaining the same goal, you may not understand this process, but it is very much true.  Whenever a problem arises in such an environment, the issue usually bounces around until someone who is only marginally at fault owns up to it or someone just sacrifices themselves to make it go away.  Welcome to business and welcome to our unstable world as a whole.

In the same way we make excuses to curb judgments placed upon us, we often try to avoid these instances in our own heads as well.  The terminology I find used in this situation is often "hope".  The problem with taking the time to hope something happens in our lives is that doing so is generally just a way to avoid the issue and begin our fall into becoming stagnant.  

I remember when I lost my job and career out of the blue.  The first thing I wanted to do was go out and push until I found something else - something better - something which proved a point to those who had foolishly cut ties with me.  After about two months within the process of determination, my leads were beginning to dry and with that I started "hoping" something would come along.  
What is wrong with that?
Do we not all need to have confidence?
The thing is, "hope" tends to not be confidence at all, even though we may think it to be true.  Hope in the way we use it in this generation means we have nearly given up on what we are chasing.  The moment I started hoping for better was the exact moment I stopped my pursuit of something better and something that can and would make a big impact on my life.  The term of "hope" for me was that moment of shifting the blame on the people who put me into the place I was in at the time and when I began convincing myself that something would happen even if I let my efforts slip.  
Bad things happen to bad people, right? I am a good person.  This should be easier.
Not hardly.

You see, I allowed myself to sink down into a place I never should have been.  The rejection and hardships I was going through during the time I started "hoping" for something better should have fueled me to be stronger and fight a little bit harder, but I let myself tire of fighting instead.  I allowed myself to become distracted with other things and other people when I had one goal during that time. One damn goal.  Even though that was the only thing I should have been chasing, I slipped more and more into failure because I started "hoping" instead of taking action.  

Have things become better since then?
Yeah, when I stepped up and took responsibility, cut out all of my distractions, and decided it was time to move on and rebuild my life, things did get better.  
Is everything perfect?
Not at all.  I still have plenty of struggles and I am not exactly where I want to be anywhere in my life, but I have learned to cut out the less important and focus on growth.
I am in such a better place right now.
Growing means taking action in every little bit you can until you gain enough traction to actually step out and make an internal change in yourself.  When you grow as a person, you have to keep your entire being and mentality in line with what you are chasing after.  Pushing off something for a day only pushes us a few days backward and hinders progress until one day becomes two, then a week, then a month, all the while "hoping" something will change on its own.

Hoping to obtain something within our own lives serves as nothing more than a placeholder for the empty promises we make to ourselves.  
Action creates purpose.
Focus feeds our passions.
Never lose either.

Grace and Peace,

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